Why is it Important to Set Realistic Goals?
Realistic goals are a powerful thing. For many years, I overlooked the value of a good goal. They seemed hokey and destined for failure. More than anything, they seemed like a lot of unnecessary pressure.
Then, for some reason, I gave it a try about a week into the new year. Around that time, my night owl tendencies had gone berserk — I had been staying up until 1am a lot of nights, then getting up at 7:30am for work. Something needed to change. So I made a resolution to be in bed and ready for sleep by 11pm on weekdays.
I could probably count on my fingers and toes the amount of times I met that goal over the year. That’s like . . . maybe 20 times out of 365. When I did succeed, it was probably just because I was that tired, rather than a feat of self-discipline.
But despite the seemingly poor day-to-day success rate, the goal itself was a success. How is that? Because even though I rarely met the actual goal, my behavior changed significantly for the better. Almost immediately after setting the goal, I noticed a strange thing happening: Sometime around 10:30pm, I became more attuned to the time. I told myself I had better start thinking about shutting down for the night. By 10:50pm, I was actually getting ready for bed!
This was a revelation. So why is it important to set realistic goals? Because even if you don’t hit them, you’re likely to get closer to them than if you hadn’t set them.
Failing my way to success
While I very rarely reached my goal specific goal of being in bed by 11pm, I usually came pretty close. This made for a substantial improvement to my sleep hygiene, and that meant an improvement to my health and well-being.
The fact that the goal existed was enough to make me put more effort into my self-care. I had read about and learned about goal-setting throughout school, but it took this experience to really understand the power of a good goal.
So now, after many years of being a naysayer, I’m on board with resolutions. I’d encourage everyone to set a goal — whether it begins January 1 or otherwise. Why not? The worst-case scenario is that you end up exactly where you are now.
Below are some tips for how to set goals.
How to set realistic goals
I’ll use my own example to give you an idea of how to refine a goal from a general idea to something specific and tangible. This was the broad goal:
- I will go to sleep earlier.
Make your goal specific
It’s important to make your goals concrete. You want them to be measurable, so you know exactly what you are aiming for. If I had kept the goal of, “I will go to sleep earlier,” it probably wouldn’t have worked.
When, exactly, is earlier? If I was in the habit of going to sleep at 1am, then 12:45am would still be earlier. But getting to sleep 15 minutes earlier clearly wasn’t what I had in mind. A broad goal gives you too much leeway.
- I
will go to sleep earlier. - I will go to sleep at 11pm.
Goals should be within your control
I couldn’t just snap my fingers and keel over for the night; going to sleep is not a conscious decision. The best I could do was give myself a favorable environment for sleep to occur. For a bedtime goal, that means being in bed.
I may have done more harm than good if I worried too much about the exact minute I was supposed to be asleep. So I focused on what I could control — being in bed. This is tangible and, again, measurable. Here’s where we are now:
I will go to sleep earlier.I will go to sleep at 11pm.- I will be in bed at 11pm.
Goals may need other goals
A behavior change can create a domino effect — you may need to make some other changes to give yourself the best shot at reaching your goal.
For example, an important part of getting to sleep at night is how you chose to spend your time before bed. The blue light from electronics can disturb sleep, so it’s best to turn off all electronics thirty minutes before you’d like to be asleep.
I didn’t know about this at first — I googled it along the way. When I did, I altered my behavior to incorporate this new knowledge. My goal was a working document, not a contract.
While I didn’t always stow away the phone or computer 30 minutes before bed, I did make sure to put my electronics away before I started my nightly hygiene, which gave me 10-15 minutes without blue light as I wound down. After 11pm had passed, I also made sure to put away my books and other distractions. All of this seemed to have a positive effect. Thus my goal became:
I will go to sleep earlier.I will go to sleep at 11pm.I will be in bed at 11pm.- I will be in bed without distraction at 11pm.
This was the goal in its final incarnation. Simple, realistic, and effective . . . not in the sense that I was in bed at 11pm every weekday night, but that I was usually in bed by 11:20pm or so, and that was a vast improvement over the 1am bedtime I was accustomed to.
Example #2
I’ll run through a couple more quick examples to show you how this process would work in different circumstances. Say your goal is:
- Save more money.
First, get specific. What is ‘more money’? This will help you to really dig into your motivations. Are you saving for retirement, or for a more immediate expense? Have you researched the costs of the expense in question? Answering these questions will help you to settle on a realistic figure.
Let’s say, after some research, you have decided you want to save $10,000 in a year. That’s $834 a month, or $195 a week.
Save more money.- Save $195 per week.
Now you’re starting to get specific, but specific doesn’t always mean realistic. You need to make sure your goal is possible for you, and to do that you’ll need to know your budget. For that, I’ll send you over here. Say, after crunching the numbers, you determine that $195 is too high based on your income and necessary expenses, so you change it to something more feasible — $5000 in a year/$97 per week.
Save more money.Save $195 per week.- Save $97 per week.
Now you have a goal that is within your control; you know you can achieve it. Now go back to your budget, and find out where you are going to find that $87/week. For the sake of simplicity let’s say you go out for lunch every weekday, spending an average of $20. That’s $100 a week, right there. You can get awfully close to your goal for the year simply by packing your lunch for work.
Save more money.Save $195 per week.- Save $97 per week by packing lunch on weekdays.
This is the goal in its final form. It’s realistic, and you have a plan to get there. The goal is concise and memorable, as well. Even if you still go out for lunch from time to time — whether it’s because you want to catch up with a friend, or you just forgot to re-up on bread at the grocery store — chances are that the presence of the goal in the back of your mind will influence your behavior for the better.
Example #3
For the final example, let’s say your goal is:
- Be healthier
This alone won’t help you much. What is ‘healthier’? Do you want to exercise more, lose weight, improve your diet, or all of the above? Maybe you already have a handle on your diet, but you can’t seem to talk yourself into exercising.
Be healthier- Exercise daily.
This is better. But when are you going to make the time? When you look at your schedule, you may realize that exercising daily isn’t realistic, but you know that you have some free time after work on Mondays, Tuesdays, and Thursdays. You decide you’ll exercise at the gym when you get home from work on those days.
Be healthierExercise daily.- Exercise after work on Mondays, Tuesdays, and Thursdays.
Now you just need to decide when and for how long you will exercise. If you want to prioritize cardio, then maybe you’ll run on the treadmill for 20 minutes.
Be healthierExercise daily.Exercise after work on weekdays- Run on the treadmill for 20 minutes, immediately after work on Mondays, Tuesdays, and Thursdays.
Now you have a specific goal to work with. You know when, where, and how you’ll accomplish it.
Whatever your goal — getting to bed earlier, saving money, losing weight, you can go through this same process to refine your goal from something broad to something specific and achievable.
You’re going to fail at your goals . . . and that’s okay
You may not always succeed in reaching your goal (especially a daily goal), and that is okay. Life is unpredictable, and we’re human — we have lapses in self-control, and our priorities change in the short and long terms. Your work schedule might change, and that could throw off your routine, etc.
The important thing is that you make your goal realistic and just keep at it. If physical or mental obstacles deter you in the short-term, just get back on track as soon as you can — don’t let them cause you to give up on your long-term goal. Sometimes coming up short can feel bad, but feeling bad can be good for you.
Chances are good that if you set a realistic goal, put consistent effort into it, and are willing to be flexible as unforeseen events happen, you’ll see improvement over time. Don’t become overly preoccupied with success or failure.
Consider:
- You can fail every day at your goal to eat a vegetable at every meal, while still eating enough vegetables to improve your health
- You can fail every day at your goal to exercise for 30 minutes, while still exercising enough to become more physically fit
- You can fail every day at your goal to write 200 words, while still practicing enough to become a better writer
I think you get the point . . .
Whether or not you succeed at a goal is irrelevant; it’s the progress you make that matters. Using these tips to set realistic goals can ensure that even a failure will be a success.
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